Posted 20 hours ago

Prison Nights: Two Straight Lads Discover Friendship, Love and Sex in a British Jail

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When I was in middle school, a friend and I used to 'experiment' when one of us would spend the night. On two occasions, we put on some porn, starting masturbating, then gave each other (very excellent) hand jobs. As far as I’m concerned, if you’re British with experience of depression, it’s very likely you’ve bunked off school or work, stayed in bed watching ITV Daytime past noon and formed a strong and loving connection with Alison Hammond. He will tell you he “knew a gay chap once”, but this will turn out to be someone who fell over during a game of lacrosse and asked for a plaster for his knee.

Sometimes, straight men mask the “hook up” and “dismiss it” as such if there’s only oral contact — and especially if they, themselves, just sit back and enjoy. Thus, bud-sex is predicated on rejecting romantic attachment and deep emotional ties, but not all emotion. It was a very positive experience; I learned a lot about myself and LGBT issues, and the guy is still my BFF. I found myself and my best mate, Dom, staring in shock at our privately educated friend Poppy cooking breakfast in halls and admitting that she had never used a microwave.But once I find out the guy is taken or not interested in my kind it’s like phew I don’t have anything to worry about. But as I've gotten older and shed some cultural baggage, I've allowed myself to be attracted to men, and would totally date/sleep with the right guy.

There is an alliance, an understanding that some straight people still harbour prejudice – and a recognition that what differentiates us can be celebrated, learned about and enjoyed. Throw in Andrew's crumbling life, Zachary's bad past, their surprising friendship, and Corbett's messed up personality, and you got just a couple of Straight Boys. Ihavefallenfortwoofmybestmates,bothwerestraight,andbothtimesIfeltlikeIalmosthadnothingtoliveforwithoutthemandhadabreakdown.Eddy rocked up wearing the 2013 lad’s lad weekend uniform: navy jacket, navy chinos, navy cap and a Newcastle United 2008 away top (available in navy) while I “daringly” wore a crisp white shirt, dad bod blue jeans and black boots. I also had variations of 'I can't believe I'm doing this' running through my head for most of the time, but that just made it better in a strange way.

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